About AkanniRichmanDh
Did you hear about the
boy who was
told to do 100 lines?
He drew 100 cats on the paper.
He thought
the teacher had said lions.
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A man and his girlfriend were out to dinner
one night. The waiter tells them the night's special is chicken
almondine and fresh fish.
"The chicken sounds good; I'll have
that," the woman says.
The waiter nods. "And the vegetable?" he
asks.
"Oh, he'll have the fish," she replies.
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Does your dog know how how to
surf the
internet?
No - but he's got a ruff idea.
grooming standard poodle
Karen: Have you noticed
that Daddy
is getting taller ?
Sharon: No, why ?
Karen: His head is sticking
through his hair.
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A little boy came running into the kitchen.
'Dad, dad' he said, 'there's a monster at the door with a really
ugly
face'
'Tell him you've already got one,' said his father
!
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Mom: Joe, time for your medicine.
Joe: I'll
run the bath then.
Mom: Why?
Joe: Because on the bottle it says
"to be taken in water."
Gardens
Pupil (on phone) : My son has a bad cold and
won't be able to come to school today.
School Secretary: Who is
this?
Pupil: This is my father speaking!
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What do headmasters and bullfrogs have in common
?
Both have big heads that consist mostly of mouth !
Pet Food
Q: What's the difference between a
chainsaw
and an accordion?
A: A chainsaw can be tuned.
ConstantinYasirTX
Mrs Jones: Now, remember, children,
travel is very
good for you. It broadens the mind.
Betty,
muttering: If you're anything to go by, that's not all it
broadens!
EIlisDeependukr
Q. How do you know a blonde has been
using
the computer?
A. There is cheese in front of the mouse.
AditsanSorrellKC
An old lady was considering buying a
squirrel fur
coat. "But will it be all right in the rain?" she asked
anxiously.
"Oh certainly, ma'am," said the manager smoothly.
"After all,
you've never seen a squirrel with an umbrella have you?"
WyligbyOhanzeeUi
Q: Why do blondes drive BMWs?
A1: Because
they can spell it.
A2: Because they can spell BWM.
DanyCacanisiusdM
What do cows like to line dance to ?
Any kind
of moosic you like !
CheaukaRemingtonGp
Q. Why is it so hard for women to find men that
are
sensitive,
caring, and good-looking?
A. Because those men
already have boyfriends.
RamziDavidoF
Q: How many republicans
does it take to
disarm the law abiding public so that the government can
enforce
totalitarianistic and unconstitutional laws?
A: None. The
Sociali--Democrats do that
WartunLewellynLe
Q: Whatever happened to the bedbugs who fell in
love?
A: They got married in the spring.
KennethNiewheallDN
Q: What is Clinton's plan to create thousands
of small businesses?
A: Take thousands of big businesses and wait
four years.
BelldenTobyms